Disability Insurance

And while we wait for the 'all clear' that will allow me to take up my position at the assigned desk at the job that I actually like and enjoy, we've been told that the 'general sick leave' allowance will run out the first week of March.  So now we have to get the Long Term Disability Insurance activated.  I've reviewed the forms, passed the appropriate ones on to my GP and the Doctor managing my rehab...  this is getting interesting, and just a wee bit scary.

The disability insurance provider that is used by my place of work requires a number of different forms to be filled in so that they can properly adjudicate the claim.  The employer has a form which essentially (although I haven't seen it) describes the duties of the job one is no longer able to do.  The employee, meaning 'me' also has a form to fill out which seems to be an assessment of your understanding of your job, and whether you think you can perform it properly.   There is a third form which needs to come from your physicians.  Notice that I pluralized that.  They want to hear from your attending, and the key specialists.  This is especially important because it is going to be one or more of these good folks who have said you shouldn't be going back to work at the moment.
I am cautioned that the process for evaluation and adjudication can take up to six weeks.

We must remember that one of the primary goals of the insurance provider are to ensure that the insured person is not subjected to undue financial hardship during their disability period by providing an alternate source of income and then to help get the insured person back to work wherever possible.  It is my understanding that they may even entertain the notion of retraining...

The disability insurance that I have through my employer will provide 70% of the original salary.  It is also my understanding that my employer will continue to make pension contributions on my behalf and manage my other medical and life insurance benefits.

You do need to take this stuff seriously.  They will be asking your doctors some pretty heavy duty stuff.  And you do need to give the doctors permission to release the information.  Don't be silly about it; sign the release.  It could mean the difference between an accepted or rejected claim.

Has Google’s march towards world domination stalled?

Google’s attempts at world domination through the subversion of the efficacy and productivity of the individual user will never have even the limited success that Apple has enjoyed because the Google organization does not have a charismatic front man like Steve Jobs who can convince the individual that by placing their trust in Apple and allowing Apple to control their user experience they will be better off and enjoy something that no other organization can offer.  Google just doesn’t have the talent to make that presentation a convincing one.  And the marketing of Google’s capabilities, how the individual user benefits from surrendering completely to the Google environment and how Google is more than a search engine is woefully inadequate.  Time for Google to find a new pitch man…

I’ve lost a bit of the joy…

As we celebrate Christmas I find that I’m not feeling anywhere near as joyous as I have in past years.  Sure, we’ve done the same things with variations, but the same things nevertheless.  I can’t quite figure out why I don’t feel the joy.  Is it because of the sword that hangs over me?  the dramatic change in how things go forward from here weighs so very heavily on me.  I can no longer travel with impunity; I must now carry huge amounts of medical insurance.  What do I do about retirement?  Is it the the question of when my life will return to normal?  Or is it the overriding need to see my wife back to normal?  Her depression, her trying to be all things to all people, and especially her having to take on the role of chauffeur and driver when the weather is bad?  My greatest fear is that she will give up and not fight for the future we were planning for… 

I’ seem to have become an unhappy person. This is silly.  I have so very little to be unhappy about, and so much to be thrilled about.  Time to find some joy...

Be an active participant in your own life

There are few things so demeaning, debilitating or soul numbing as not participating in your own life, whether it be because of choice, personal neglect or being actively prevented...

Get in there and take an active role in what is happening to you and your world.  Check out my entries on the 'short list'.  Maybe it will help.

Stop sleepwalking through life.

We are diminished as a species with the passing of each luminary…

Nelson Mandela was such a luminary, and we are diminished as a species with his passing on December 5, 2013.

The timeline of a Stroke

I am assured that everyone is different, so here’s a draft and definitely incomplete narrative of the timeline that tracks my stroke and treatment to date;

Tuesday, November 5, 2013, 4:00 AM.  A severe headache woke me and got me out of bed.  My wife found me in the kitchen at 4:30 AM, clutching my head.  The pain was on the right side of my head.  My wife convinced me to take a couple of Tylenol and try to go back to sleep.  By the time I felt comfortable enough to get up, my darling was dressed on pretty much ready to begin her commute and her day.  I got up, got dressed, took my synthroid, made a cup of coffee then showered and dressed.  I left the hose just prior to 8:00 AM to head to work…It was at this point that I realized something wasn’t right….and I recall saying it out loud to myself as I tried to start the Jeep.  Things just didn’t feel ‘right’…On one level, it almost felt like I had had a drink or two.  I described it to myself, and then to the doctors later as ‘cognitive dissonance’.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013 10:30 AM ish.  After briefly chatting with staff members, I excused myself to go home to take a nap so that I could be fresh for a 1:00 PM meeting.  the headache was not abating, nor was the sense of disorientation.  I nearly walked into one of the client support team members.  So as I was leaving the building and walking to my Jeep, I decided that a quick trip to the Emergency department was more in order, than just going home for a nap.
The initial visit to Emergency was very unsatisfactory.  I got tucked into the back of a largish holding area, was hooked up to a heart monitor and left alone for over an hour.  I got cold.  I got hungry…  no one came when I pressed the call button…so I dressed, put on my very distinctive hat and long leather coat and walked past the nurses station which had three or four nurses hanging about, and left the emergency area without being challenged.
I went back to work, ate my packed lunch and acquitted myself reasonably well during the meeting.  Apparently I looked terrible, and my direct supervisor was mortified to discover that I had been at the hospital, but had come back to work.  She insisted that I go home immediately after the meeting…I didn’t.  I waited another couple of hours… I also talked with my wife who was equally upset that I had gone to the hospital and left.  I arrived home at about 5:00 PM; she immediately put me back into the Jeep and took me to Emergency.  Once in Emerg, we saw a doctor this time within 20 minutes.  I had a CT scan within half an hour of that…. and the doctor, Dr. Wong confirmed that the CT showed a bleed.  I was in a transfer ambulance within minutes headed to the University of Alberta Hospital Emergency room…  the CTs follow.

I've had to remove the CT scans because their labelling contains a bit too much personal information.  I am working on editting the images to remove the personal info and will re-post soon.  Hopefully later today or early tomorrow.

Thursday, November 6, 2013 an angiogram and angioplasty was performed to map the vascular structure and bleed in my brain.

Friday, November 8, 2013 what can only be described as brain surgery was performed to ensure the bleed was closed off and to do some preventative work to ensure it didn't happen again.  there seems to be some confusion on the date and what actually happened.  What they did was perform an arteriovenous fistula embolization.  Huh?  It means they squirted a type of glue into the compromised vascular structure and sealed the leaks.

I’ll post this incomplete narrative now…but I will come back and edit it and complete it in the next day or so.

Wednesday, Novmber 13, 2013... they let me go home...

December 2, 2013... first meeting and assessment with the Stroke Rehabilitation team at the Glenrose Hospital in Edmonton Alberta.

December 6, 2013.... meeting with Dr. Michael Chow, the neuro surgeon who worked his magic on the plumbing in my brain.

December 2013... referral to Dr. Michael Johnson, NeuroOpthomologist.  Still haven't heard a word...

Tuesday, January 7, 2014...  first full sessions with therapists at the Glenrose.